Thursday, October 18, 2012

my total thyroidectomy

Well here's what you've been waiting for. I came home from the hospital a week ago today. They sent me home with this steri-strip bandage and said to take it off in a week. So this morning, I dropped Thanan off at school, and came home to delve into the task. I was very apprehensive and wished Thor was still here looking after both my physical and emotional health. I was pleased to see that all the bruising is gone now, as I had a few and one was quite large.

I took a deep breath and started to peel off the bandage. It came off easily, and was pretty much barely still stuck on. I had thought that my neck felt so "tuggish" there because of the bandage, but it is just because of the trauma, I've discovered.

Here it is, freshly uncovered. I hadn't washed it yet. I think that I should be considering myself lucky because all of the other thyroidectomy scars I have seen on people have been literally twice as long or more than mine is... yet... I want to cry. I don't recognize whose neck that is... I don't feel like that's who I am. It doesn't look as bad in the pic as it does in real life. It's quite a puffy scar, because I tend to scar that way, and will be quite visible forever now, I think. I fear.

I put on this brave face, but inside I am very emotional. I'll just have to come to terms with it all, and accept how I look now. I have to be thankful and I should be feeling blessed. I made it through the surgery well. I still have my voice in tact and it's smoother and better sounding than it has been in years (though I haven't really given my singing voice a fair try yet as it strains my vocal chords right now), and I still have my parathyroid glands in tact so I won't have any calcium deficiencies. I can swallow again without things getting stuck in my throat. These are things I am very grateful for. I am grateful that Thor was here to see me through the whole thing and take care of me, and I am grateful that I seem to be adapting to the synthroid without too much problem. I am grateful that the anesthetic seems to finally be gone from my body and that I am building my stamina back up. This is the beginning of a new chapter in life. I guess I'll just have to keep turning the pages, one page at a time.

Jules :Oj


SIMON said...

All looking really good, Jules. Glad you're making good progress.
I'm pretty sure that all the scarring will disappear in six months or so.
I wish you the very best in speedy recoveries!!

Quiet Paths said...

I'm so glad it's over for you. Hope each day you feel better. They did a good job, looks like from here? :)

Jules said...

Si - Yes, I think within a year I'll hardly be able to tell it's there.

QP - They did, I am thankful for the small incision and the other potential complications (like losing my voice)not being there.

Dean Grey said...

Big (((HUGS))) to you, Jules!


Jules said...

Big HUGS back, Dean. Thank you!