In case you don't already know, if you have a son between the ages of 7 - 12 who plays the video game Mine Craft, he may have settings that you aren't aware of. I learned of one of them a while ago, then I needed to know the second setting. Now I've been introduced to the all important third setting. I wish I knew the third one about 4 years ago. This discovery came about one day when I was bathing Thanan and I neeeded him to close his eyes, hold his breath and sit still so I could rinse out his hair and face without splashing water in his mouth or eyes.
It went like this:
"Mom, if you want me to sit perfectly still, or stand still, or not move at all, all you have to do is say the word 'iron' and then I turn into iron. Iron doesn't move at all, so neither will I."
So in the spirit of this somewhat logical explanation, I went along with it. I soon discovered that he does indeed turn perfectly still when I declare "Iron!"
The second setting was called "butter" which is what mine crafters refer to "gold" as in the game. Gold can of course be melted into liquid form, but eventually it hardens and returns to its normal solid state. Butter, in the realm of the bathtub meant that he would return to normal, it shuts off all other previously engaged settings.
Recently, I learned of the almighty "coal" setting. Coal is wonderful. Of course, coal was used to run furnaces, the more you added to the fire, the hotter the heat got. Well.. coal in a child's setting runs him much the same way. If I say "Coal!" he will speed up. If I say "Coal, coal, coal!" he becomes something like 3 times as fast as his normal speed would be. I suppose if he ever becomes the Olympic Sprinter that he wants to become, I'll be the only person jumping up and down shouting "Coal!!!" from the stands.
So, an important recap...
Iron - turns an 8 year old boy into a motionless and silent little human.
Coal - speeds the slowest of the slow into fast machines.
Butter - reduces the child to his normal state of life.
I wonder how many other elements I will have to memorize over the next year.