Thursday, February 11, 2016

Stop that... just stop it.

Ok, I just have to say that a large portion of men do not know how to dress in jeans. Here are some guidelines to help you poor souls out.

1) When you try on a pair of jeans, if they fit well, they will highlight both your front package as well as your behind. Look in the mirror, front AND back (for God's sake, look at the rear view) and make sure there's a little somethin-somethin for the lady in your life to look at. You have asses, and we appreciate looking at them.

2) If you are sporting a jean that is too baggy thereby creating "elephant butt" you are wearing the wrong jeans. Ok, I recognize that all jeans bag out, sometimes within 30 minutes of putting them on, but having to look at a man's saggy bum jeans is really a turn off. Really, men. Find jeans that show off your bum. Your woman/partner thinks your bum is cute.

3) Jeans should be comfortably sitting somewhere close to your belly button, typically men are sposed to wear them just below it. Too high and you might as well be naked because we can see your moose knuckles all too prominently (it's nice to leave something to the imagination). Too low and we can see your butt crack, or you lose bum definition entirely, and that's not exactly ideal. For men who insist on wearing their pants half way down their legs or underneath their bum with a belt cinching them on, just stop being ridiculous. Stop that.

4) Finding the right pair of jeans can take a while. It's not like buying a screwdriver at the hardware store. Try on different styles, different name brands, different fits, different colors. You don't need to spend a fortune to find nice fitting jeans. Look for sales and just surrender to the fact that you might have to try on something different to find something pleasing.

Just please, please stop doing this:

 I got these images from Redefining the Face of Full credit given. 

I don't know why it happens. It's a bummer, and in just this morning's drive to work, I saw 7 out of 8 men wearing elephant butt jeans. Ugh.

I'm guessing this isn't just a one sided ditty. Women, pay attention to this as well. Remember that jeans bag out! You still need to show off those voluptuous curves. Men don't want to see your jeans sagging either. You don't have to go skin tight, but employ the same rules when trying on jeans... look in the front and the back, make sure they actually look good before walking out of the store with them. Seemingly impossible tasks ARE achievable.

Ok. I've said my piece.

Jules :Oseriously)

No comments: